Ramblings - Chicken & egg situation

I realize I missed out on some perspectives being who I am.

I am ambitious. I am greedy. I am a little power crazy. Since 2003, I’m now in my 4^th company … and each time I moved … it’s for better career prospect or higher pay.

In some ways, people told me it’s envious to progress quickly, so I enjoyed the acclaim. But each time I joined a new company … I started asking where I’d go next … least for HP, Marcus Evans & ABF. But the thirst & greed for more power & money leaves me moving all the time … and perhaps I am making money …

But emotionally … I’m sucked dry because I spend so much time building relations … and at some point where things don’t work out … I simply bailed out.

It of course does not help to have ready suitors offering me positions … or headhunting me, especially when I just joined my new companies as in for ABF & now.

It’s programmed somewhere that I have escape chutes ready whenever I’m ready to bail … and with more money. And because of my greediness for money & power … I’ve often thought of moving on to Singapore … lured by the pull of the hard Singaporean dollar.

Take my friend, KF.

He’s been in his company for the past 3 years (think almost 4). He has steadily grown there … he has built his network … and if we look in terms of emotional reserve, he has a lot in there. And he’s less greedy as me. Furthermore, he’s got a house, he’s engaged … so there’s a lot of certainty & direction in life than me.

At times … I feel lost … because although the direction is certainly up for career … but I can’t be certain of where & who because there’s the niggling thought that someone may tempt me with a bigger & better offer. And we aren’t even talking about solidity in personal life yet.

Hard as it may to admit, everything is linked to each other … being unstable in job is part of the reason why I was hesitant to engage in relationships. Being unstable in relationships, I was hesitant to be stuck in fixed jobs.

Being a chicken & egg situation … I think the perhaps best way is to make a decision & stick with it. So … as per my previous post … make commitments …to job … & settle into my own house soon.

Then perhaps I can cease envying KF & have my own space & hopefully enjoy the nice feeling of settling into a more certain direction …

Has to start somewhere … why not here & why not now?

BSB capers – Polar loses his wheels

Jingle bells

Grizzly smells

Baby laid an egg

The polar bear, lost his wheels

The ding-dong got away …

It’s like any weekend when I went home to Subang and especially that weekend I had more reasons to vacate my pad in Serdang Hill cos Mrs. Polar (aka LCY) was in town … so better leave those lovebirds to (ahem) enjoy the privacy …

So I can’t remember exactly what’s going on, but he was in Sunway Pyramid (in those days, it was one of THE places to be) … and I thought ok … these 2 having a good time & romantic movie …

I got a call around 3pm … and I thought … hmmm, a little too early for night outings, no? hehe, time for the tragic news … kekeke

Well … Polar lost his bike keys & by the time he walked back to the crime scene … his ride wasn’t there anymore … and now this guy needs to make a report. Those days Pyramid did not have their small station, so needed to get him to the one in PJ …

And what a drama … cos by the time he made the report & all, things looked topsy turvy … he was wondering if he dropped it or he left it at the ignition …

But all in all … damage was done … so thought of sending him back, but think in the end, someone came to get him (either that or they took a train back to Serdang)

So LCY went back … & our fren depended on Baby to go to class … but within a few days … the cops gave him a call … said they caught the guy (he was dumb enough to use the stolen bike in the vicinity of Sunway & using it for a snatch crime) … again, you can see that Malaysia was already BOLEH back then … typical Malaysian stupidity.

So he had to go to court, do some testimony, bla bla … then got his bike back. At least that’s what I thought I remembered from it. (Anyway, if my version was distorted, I’m sure he’ld drop come komens here)

BSB Capers – The bogus lucky draw gifts

This was towards the end of 2^nd year … and there was a mini LC dinner in place of the usual glitzy AD&D … (but we're not here to talk about why that decision ... so let's move on to the story)

So anyway, since my job in the board was to deal with companies & to garner sponsorships was one of the tasks for this dinner … so me had to come in …

Now, some gifts for the lucky draw were easily sourced out as some parents / family members of the organizing committee gave stuff … which made the job easier …

Me? I just called up some alumni & got quite a few stuff in … but I can’t help noticing that some from the alumni were coming from their own ‘housing excess’ … like very old (but unopened) CDs , shirts & stuff.

At that time, I had won some CDs from some contest a few years back, but one was a Satanic verse CD, another was a heavy metal shit … coupled in with a few classic CDs from the Hitz Cruisers … AND one dumb Independence Day 2 movie … in other words .. stuff I didn’t want … always thought keeping them would be for SOME purpose …

Of course … then was THE PERFECT MOMENT!

Now Baby (being the usual observant guy around) he asked me what were these stuff doing on my desk? And I told him that I planned to ‘dispose’ them off & donate them as gifts to the OC … then he burst into one of his classic laugh stances … him holding his stomach, throwing his head backwards & laughing with his palm on his forehead …

Of course the laugh continued with a few more ridiculous jibes, but the best that I remember until today was … ‘I wonder who would get that dumb Independence Day 2 VCD? Semoga tuhan merestui nya … ’

It’s really a turkey of a movie … & NOTHING like the original Independence Day flick … and we thought … what IF I got one of them back?

‘Then, ah, it’s meant to be that I own these crap’ was my wistful exclamation ...

The best laugh came during the dinner … these guys opened their wrapped CDs & when we heard Vincent saying that ‘Hey, I got Independence Day 2 VCD’ … I just sat at my corner, looked at Baby & we laughed away for this ridiculous moment …

There you go ... a proud VCD owner ... Enjoy the movie man!!!!

PS. I wondered who got the Satanic verse CD … hehehe … cos I didn’t get any of them back … hohoho

House of glass – where dreams take you

‘Can I join you?’

‘Sure, if you don’t mind the cold’

‘So, what are you looking at?’

‘The snow, the village, the people, the serenity of this place … it’s a great morning isn’t it?’

‘Is it? Then you must come to my village, you’d enjoy it’

‘I’m sure I’d’

…

‘So tell me Jayko, what brought you here? Who are you really?’

‘Haha.’ Typical Slovak trait … diving straight to the point, but I like that. ‘ I dunno, just followed my heart, a voice inside told me that I should go somewhere’

‘What did your heart tell you?’

‘Be different, seek different, seek deeper, seek meaningful paths’

‘That’s really deep’

‘Haha. I grew up in my town being one of the less rich people. Most people I know went overseas as children & told me wonderful stories of America, Europe, Hong Kong & many others. I’ve only been to Singapore & Thailand at that time’

‘Mmm … ok’

‘I loved seeing new places & I told myself that one day I shall go to all of the places they went & even more …

‘And you are here, right now … at this moment. And I think its great cause that’s what I want to do’

‘Ok, just do it’

‘Oh, I don’t know. Can I?’

‘You can, just take 1 thing at a time. Every step you take opens a door to further opportunities’

‘How?’

‘When I took my 1^st job, I never thought I could do it. Sales! How can a nerdy kid sell when he’s not a good talker?’

‘Can’t imagine you like that’

‘Long story. Anyway, I took the job & the job changed my life because I learnt many things school cannot teach me. But, at that time I had no idea where the job will take me. I just followed my heart.’

‘And your point is?’

‘Look, I never planned to be here, right now, right this moment when I joined AIESEC. I could have been somewhere else, like working in some company back in Malaysia’

‘Hahaha’

‘But I am here now, sharing with you this story … maybe a moral … because …’

‘What?’

‘You can be telling the same to someone else in the future & continue to pass this magic forward.’

…

‘The heart does not lie does it?’

‘No, it’s what you want deep inside. It’s the light that glimmers when everything goes dark & murky’

‘Amazing, I will remember this … always ’

House of glass – where dreams take you

‘Can I join you?’

‘Sure, if you don’t mind the cold’

‘So, what are you looking at?’

‘The snow, the village, the people, the serenity of this place … it’s a great morning isn’t it?’

‘Is it? Then you must come to my village, you’d enjoy it’

‘I’m sure I’d’

…

‘So tell me Jayko, what brought you here? Who are you really?’

‘Haha.’ Typical Slovak trait … diving straight to the point, but I like that. ‘ I dunno, just followed my heart, a voice inside told me that I should go somewhere’

‘What did your heart tell you?’

‘Be different, seek different, seek deeper, seek meaningful paths’

‘That’s really deep’

‘Haha. I grew up in my town being one of the less rich people. Most people I know went overseas as children & told me wonderful stories of America, Europe, Hong Kong & many others. I’ve only been to Singapore & Thailand at that time’

‘Mmm … ok’

‘I loved seeing new places & I told myself that one day I shall go to all of the places they went & even more …

‘And you are here, right now … at this moment. And I think its great cause that’s what I want to do’

‘Ok, just do it’

‘Oh, I don’t know. Can I?’

‘You can, just take 1 thing at a time. Every step you take opens a door to further opportunities’

‘How?’

‘When I took my 1^st job, I never thought I could do it. Sales! How can a nerdy kid sell when he’s not a good talker?’

‘Can’t imagine you like that’

‘Long story. Anyway, I took the job & the job changed my life because I learnt many things school cannot teach me. But, at that time I had no idea where the job will take me. I just followed my heart.’

‘And your point is?’

‘Look, I never planned to be here, right now, right this moment when I joined AIESEC. I could have been somewhere else, like working in some company back in Malaysia’

‘Hahaha’

‘But I am here now, sharing with you this story … maybe a moral … because …’

‘What?’

‘You can be telling the same to someone else in the future & continue to pass this magic forward.’

…

‘The heart does not lie does it?’

‘No, it’s what you want deep inside. It’s the light that glimmers when everything goes dark & murky’

‘Amazing, I will remember this … always ’

just me ...